Love your body, make better love

I am continuing the conversation from last week on sex and libido. Now is the time its in front of me from clients questions and thoughts so I am going to address it.  

Loving our body male or female is so important. I am not going to say I don't struggle, I do.  Before kids, after having kids, micro managing my body and every roll or dimple.  I used to have that on my mind when in the gym, and you know what I found?  As soon as I began letting that go and training because I enjoyed it, my body became better than ever with minimal effort.  It was also on my mind in the bedroom even though my partner had no problem with my body. It was all me. 

 I began focusing on taking care of myself sexually.  WOW, the hurdles you have to get through in your mind to do this.  I once read a Momma Gena book in college and she talked about getting to know your vagina.  YES! she had you in the book, get a mirror out and take a look. Now, why, at 20 something is that the first time I had really looked at my vagina?   So many reasons, and a lot have nothing to do with our own thoughts but societies, parents etc. which then shaped our thoughts negatively.   

Even with the work I did through that book I still was not in touch or would touch myself.  I wasn't until about a year and a half ago that I made it a mission to get in touch with myself and my body. Learn how to pleasure myself for me. Not for someone else, not on a time table of when I was having sex, but when I was relaxed and in a place to get to know myself.  It was very empowering for my confidence and for me loving my body. I felt very much in control of myself.  I never let thoughts like, gross, nasty, slutty etc come into my head. Only thoughts of love and empowerment. 

Being sexually confident does't mean you are going around and sleeping with just anyone.  Being sexually confident means you own your body and your sexuality, male or female.  You have confidence in your curves, your smile, your passion for life.   This sexual energy is also very attractive to those around you ( not because they want to sleep with you) but because it is a light shining from you. 

So as you do this work and as you examine your body find what you love, find what makes you powerful, unique and sexy.   let go of what you want to "fix" if you are moving forward, the things that need "fixing" will begin to work out. I promise.   

Remember you are powerful and you were created with a purpose. Own your power, go after your purpose and thrive. Its pretty amazing when it all comes together.

Ep: 16 Ingredients in products effecting your libido

After my sex libido post I got some questions about products and what ingredients are the problem. I briefly addressed that in this youtube video.

Kicking up the Libido

Libido, its a taboo topic for some, just like poop. Well we all know I am not afraid to talk about poop, nor sex.... although not at the same time :) 
Over the many years of working one on one with clients I will hear how their libido is suffering here is what I believe to be true:
 - There is a lack of desire
- There is a lack of will
- and there is crazy hormone stuff going on that gives you no desire and has you feeling unbalance and dry. 
Now the first two are not in my category.   The last one is. If someone mentally knows they want to, has desire for their partner but just can't seem to make it work.  It is a sign of hormone imbalance, due to poor eating, toxicity and stress (lack of sleep lack of self care etc).  
A large disruptor of our hormones and libido is toxicity and stress. When toxins are present in the body and not released they continue through the body and again affect our hormones 

Sex hormones can be converted into stress hormones, but not the other way around.So the reality is, your healthy sex life will suffer and always have to sacrifice and “take one for the team.” Stress ultimately perpetuates toxicity, low libido, emotional disconnect, infertility and difficulty achieving pregnancy.  excerpt from my 21 Day Signature Cleanse

I originally created my 21 Day cleanse for this reason... 21 Days to Better Sex. I got scared, kept the originally under tones of libido and allowed it to still do the job with out the name. We are inherently sexual beings who seek out pleasure. When this is not happening or the body is not clean things will being to feel like they are missing.   
To tap into your energized sexual self here are a few tips:
Cleanse:  Get a great food based cleanse that includes superfood and quality super herbs. Not just a cleanse that has you taking a bunch of supplements but one that cleanses with food... changes habits. ( I know a couple good ones, *wink *wink)
Rest: Practice self care.  get a massage, go to bed a little early, ask for help instead of trying to do it all
Toxic Products:  Begin eliminating toxic products for your body and hormone. Many carry hormone disrupters that are wrecking havoc on your body and not helping your liver do its job. 

I find a healthy sex life between two consenting adults very important for your emotional and spiritual well being. You have to take care of your body and mind to allow this to happen.
I am here for you, and your libido :)

Top Sex Foods

I learned a long time ago to embrace what you enjoy, and not be afraid to talk about it.. haha.

A majority of my life is of course talking about the body and healing.  I am the gal you text about poop, vaginas, and sex.  A badge I proudly wear.    Sex is healthy (responsible), it is mood lifting, inspiring, healing, and a great form of exercise (code word "cardio" in our house). If you are choosing or wanting to have sex then it is frustrating if you have no libido.  For females becoming to dry, or for a male unable to stay erect is beyond frustrating.  Im trying to use appropriate words... not saying wet or hard, is hard :P

My 21 day Cleanse was originally going to be called 21 Days to Better Sex. I found many of my clients were not reaping the benefits of great sex and I wanted to know why. Before creating it I polled my friends and clients and ask, if they were not having sex, why?  Was it because of desire, drive, business, etc.  I got a lot of feedback which allowed me to gear the cleanse towards body image and libido, but I chose to keep the cleanse name basic. 

Here are some of my favorite foods to boost your libido. 

Bee Pollen

This tiny little superfood that comes from bees is a great oxygenator.  It speeds up blood flow and you know what that helps.  It is great for energy and stamina. Full of over 59 trace minerals it is an easy one to sprinkle on a salad, in a smoothie or to just pop in your mouth.  Be careful if you haven't had it before, start with a little bit to make sure you do not have an allergy to it. 

Deer Antler

Say what? Yes safely harvested deer antler is amazing for your libido.  It is a Jing replenisher, so ladies everything you gave to have your babies, this will help you get it back.  When the deer/elk antlers grow to a point and get sharp they will fight with them. Choosing a reputable brand, they will safely harvest the tips of the antler and use them for tinctures or pills.  It is no harm to the deer and it is very replenishing to our bodies.  I enjoy Jing Herbs and Dragon Herbs brand.  I have had male clients tell me it worked for them fairly instant.   Remember these superfoods are adaptogens so they give your body what it needs. 

Goji Berries 

Gogi is an amazing adaptogen that balances your hormones and boosts your libido.  It naturally boosts your HGH (Human Growth Hormone). Here is an email I got from a client about goji berries.

ALSO, I ordered some Goji berries, a brand you recommended and they are DELICIOUS and just after two days, am feeling more energy, and I don't know if this is a benefit from Goji berries, but my sex drive is through the roof! 

Goji can be purchased in an alcohol tincture or sun dried. I use both daily. I like to put my goji's in a coffee grinder and then mix them into my chia pudding every morning. 

Maca

Maca is an amazing root that is known for promoting sexual function. It is full of EFA's and is easy to find. It is great at balancing the endocrine system and helping with stress.  It is also adaptogen that balance hormones and also increase fertility. I mostly use it in powder form in my smoothies, elixirs and chocolate. 

 I will have you start with these and as you begin adding them into your life I hope that you see more than just a boost in your libido, but also your overall health.  Superfood and super herb nutrition creates amazing longevity.